POETRY: Just Beneath the Surface

"Just Beneath the Surface" by Dean B. [circa 2000] Just beneath the surface of her pleasant, winning smile, Pompous and indignant, it’s been there quite a while, Comforting, reliable, it keeps her in the dark, At least a million reasons and subtle quirks remark: “Sure it makes a lot of sense!” she’ll deal with it …

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From1-2-1: Even in Dark & Lonely Times, Amanda Still has Recovery

I have been sober for 3 months now. I have learned a great deal about myself and why I started using in the first place.  Many of my problems revolve around my relationship with my family.  It's not good.  Let's just say that it's not the typical relationship that you would have with your family.  …

ENTRY: Meditating… Wheels within Wheels (at First)

For the longest time--in fact it was up until recently when I actually followed through with my eleventh step, but honestly, I never knew how to meditate.  Well, that was how I used to phrase it.  I thought that there was this certain, strict procedure behind meditating.  I always thought it had something to do …

FROM 1 ADDICT 2 ANOTHER: Amanda Talks Trust

[This entry features some strong content; please exercise the appropriate discretion.] "The other day in group, my counselor asked us what that one thing was that we'd actually valued the most before our addiction, and that we ended up not caring about anymore during our addiction. Mine was trust. Before my addiction, I really valued …

ENTRY: Praying for Energy

I’ve been writing new prayers daily the last couple days.  I try to practice humility, too, so I’m not one to pat myself on the back but I am grateful that God has guided me that way, regarding my inspiration and the time that I reserve for writing and/or my visual art.  It has been …

MEDIA: Fast Car cover

Even though I strongly feel that the original Tracy Chapman version is truly the best of 'em all, I tend to enjoy all of the released renditions.  It is because I love the tune that much.  I can't say that about many songs at all.  However, "Fast Car," well, it's something special. I have always …

ENTRY: Self-Control

I would say there is comfort mentally in knowing that self-control truly is my biggest struggle.  I also think it has been the biggest catalyst for all of my major life problems, such as addiction and apprehension.  I wrote a prayer speaking of just this… God, I need you I need you completely I beg …

ENTRY: New Take on Life via Poetry

Some things that I just love about Emily Dickinson’s poetry is that she tends to shine light on very common, simple words from the English language that we use practically every single day. I love her use of capital letters in random spots for random words just as well, since it draws a great deal …

ENTRY: Spirituality, On Your Terms

I will honestly tell you that I hate going to church with my parents. Yes, ’tis true. I really do not enjoy the mandatory, mind you, action of attending Catholic mass with my family. Typically, especially as of recently since I’ve been working on a more full-time basis, when I’m home, I want to stay …